Have you seen this article?
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/environment/article6306615.ece

If it is licensed complain to the council anyway you can force a license review and you can remain anonymous.

If it’s just kids playing loud music in a domestic house you can complain to the environmental health and they can seize their audio equipment.

From previous experience of annoying neighbours a diary of the annoyances and unsocial behaviour is always helpful. Sometimes helps to let the annoyers know this as well.

I am obviously getting middle aged and find that the younger and posher the adult, the dumber they get and less understanding of others and the world they get. My younger sisters and their friends, who have all just left uni are, as their dad says, the thickest bright people he knows. A friend of one of them, an Oxford graduate no less, asked in all seriousness “The channel tunnel? Is that a bridge then?”. My dear sister Hannah, has been complaining that her bike doesn’t work. Apparently it was really difficult to go uphill. When my stepdad asked if the gears (all 21 of those big coggy things on the bike) worked ok, she said “What gears?”.

I despair, I really do.

THEY ARE OK DJS YES — WE HEAR IT — THEIR DJ GEAR IS TOP — BUT THEY PUMP THEIR PROFESSIONAL WATTAGE INTO MY 6 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER’S BEDROOM. FORTUNATELY HER 3 YEAR OLD SISTER IS UPSTAIRS WITH HER TOTALLY USELESS DAD. BUT I AM AWAKE ALL NIGHT AND CONCERNED.

If we complain, their club will close, so we will face reprisals. Not so much from them but from their clients and their suppliers.

My Danish dad used to tell me that anything elite or class one is bad and the fascists proved him right. It took loads of you gormless British to die like pigs to put it right.

I am annoyed, forgive me.

We would move but it is hard to sell a place next to a posh class one gentlemen’s club.

University of the Arts can’t do anything, council can’t do anything, their parents love it and drive Audis. Even their friends drive Audis.

We are, the Dagmars, in a word, in big trouble and extremely stressed, distressed and deep in the shit.

However, we have been in this situation before in London. And the police, whatever the posh people say, are

EXCELLENT.

1/ Wait ’till they’ve gone to sleep in the morning

2/ Turn-up your Tony Blackburn radio station up to 11

3/ Point your speakers at them

4/ Then go out for the day

Late, loud and drunken parties are where impenetrable concepts are born, where ideas turn into meaningless images and bohemian rhapsodies are created. Teeth are lost in brawls about George Braque and steamy, seamy encounters grow out of rhyming couplets and narcotic haze.

In ten years the poor dears will be sitting at their desk in a suburban childcare project and realise that these, indeed, were the days.

Under the looming tory regime, art students will become ‘results-oriented’, forced to focus on practical outcomes and will have little to look forward to except work experience in a minor direct marketing agency. We will all be the poorer because of it.

Rejuvenate your spirits by plotting revenge. Identify as many as possible and then plan how best to demonstrate your withering contempt of their output at the end-of-year shows.

Buy a beret and duffle coat and become a retro beat poet, declaiming the inadequacies of current student work in the Hermits. You may have to do it in blank verse.

Or add a coda to the party with a small anonymous note pointing out that if they have another before June you will torch their house and all within it. It might spark a little consideration.

However for all the posturing they are pamapered middle class kiddies at heart so few choice words and a threat to call the police sorted them out.

There are some totally vacuous art students about in these culturally and politically pasturised times…

They have no idea about anything…They think looking and talking the part (which they are still rubbish at) is merely enough…And they are still trying to mimic the YBA’S (Emin,Hirst,Lucas,Chapman Bros) 20 years after the train has departed! — They all think being in a band is easy but have no creativity or originality or concept about anything…so they all take drugs like the “poor” folk do when of course the majority of the latter don’t touch the stuff with a barge poll!

The Hoxton/Shoreditch scene has a lot to answer for…and no genuine,lasting legacy to show for it…

Much mirth about this next day from posh art student fellows. Wonderful sight of knackered mother with rings round eyes and dad totally humiliated, unable to protect his kids aged 6 and 3.

University of the Arts want high-paying toffs like this. Big change from just 3–4 years ago — their parents taxi for them — at college.

University of the Arts seek trend-followers who they can place in media jobs.

Total humiliation by countryshire high rollers who “play” in bands but are mumbly McFly impersonators (except McFly were good).

University of the Arts take note. You now farm “it’s so unfair” festival mass-gathering fascists who flirt with heroin and fuck over their neighbours.